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· 1,410 ratings · 113 reviews

Start your review of Every Young Man's Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation

Petra wants more princes & less frogs to kiss

I didn't read this book. I haven't even seen this book - yet. But I have sold it. This is what happened in the bookshop today,

A young local guy, aged something under 20, comes into the shop. He is small, nerdy-looking and has spots. He's very thin and dressed in clothes that don't fit. No one's idea of a Greek god. He wants to know if we have any books on sex addiction. I say I don't think so, but I'll look. I'm quite intrigued. I just don't see how this guy gets lucky enough to get addicted to

I didn't read this book. I haven't even seen this book - yet. But I have sold it. This is what happened in the bookshop today,

I tell him I can order a book for him and to sit down and I'll look for some to find the one he wants. He sits down and begins to surreptitiously pick the scabs off his spots.

Several books come up and I read the blurbs for him. I ask if they are what he is looking for. He says he's not sure. That what he wants really is a book that tells him how to avoid becoming addicted to sex.

He says that he is a Christian and a virgin, but that he feels that if he ever does have sex he will become addicted to it and that would be a sin so he's looking for something that will tell him how to avoid that.

I ask him if he's ever been uh, close, to a girl. He says he's never even had a proper date. But then he says temptation waits around every corner and it is best to be prepared.

He's ordered Every Young Man's Battle: Strategies for Victory in the Real World of Sexual Temptation. I hope it helps him win the war, but personally I've never seen why sex is a sin or virginity equals purity, especially in these days in our part of the world, when women aren't sold as property, guaranteed brand new, complete with 'seal'.

So when the book comes I may read it or perhaps just skim through it. But I doubt it.

(view spoiler)[I'm giving it 5 stars because I want to give it the benefit of the doubt. Besides it might be a really good read. Like GR stars, I can interpret a book any way I want. Not necessarily seriously. (hide spoiler)]

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Oct 29, 2007 J.G. Keely rated it did not like it

When I was a kid I used to sleep over at my best friend's house, and since he and his family were practicing Christians, I ended up going to a lot of Sunday services with them. We'd sit and listen to the pastor and sing some songs, and often, we'd go back to his house and talk about what we'd heard.

I remember going with him and his brother to Bible study a few times, where I was always shocked to find that I knew more about the Bible than the kids who were there, who could quote a hundred verses off the top of their heads, which was especially surprising to me, because I really didn't know much about the Bible.

I remember one instance where they were talking about the devil being in their heads, butting doubts and thoughts in there, making them think things they didn't want to think. I interrupted and asked if they remembered last week, when the Pastor had pointed out that nowhere in the Bible does the devil tempt anyone, let alone control their thoughts, except in the story of Job, where Lucifer had to ask God's permission first, and God did the lion's share of the tormenting.

"Am I the only one who actually listens to the pastor?" I asked, confused--they didn't have an answer for me.

It was around this point that my best friend's brother, who was also at the bible study, began to have problems with girls in school. Like most of us, he felt awkward about the new feelings he was having, and was more afraid of women than interested in them. He was a tall, blond, blue-eyed football player and girls liked to hang around him, even asking him out, which made him nervous and confused.

He was a few years younger than us and we'd been there, we knew how he felt. His parents decided to try to help him, and at their pastor's suggestion, they bought him this book.

After getting and reading it, his fear and anxiety around women seemed to increase, so me and my friend grabbed it from the coffee table, sat down in his room, and read it. We were still high school kids ourselves and hadn't had sex, but even then, we felt like this book was written by people who knew less about sex and human relationships than we did.

It's a book full of guilt and paranoia: people can't control themselves, especially women, who can't help but try to seduce you, and it's your duty to avoid them, not to look about them or think about them in sexual ways, not to have those thoughts. The fact that these relationships are expressed in terms of combat shows the level of conflict the authors feel appropriate.

But, of course, almost everyone has those thoughts. They are a natural component of how human beings work--attraction, infatuation, love, sex--these things are real, vital parts of life, secular or Christian. He tried to control his thoughts, to make them go away, but it isn't that easy.

When a person spends hours at school surrounded by other teen boys and girls who have bodies and sexual thoughts, then goes home and reads books about sexual thoughts, it's no wonder that those thoughts will consume them. If someone wandered behind you whispering "don't think about sex" over and over again throughout the day, how would you be able to think about anything else?

And perhaps the biggest problem about this book is that it encourages teens who are confused and uninformed to feel guilty, to feel like it's their job to control their thoughts and if they can't, they are failing not only themselves, but the people they are attracted to. Those sorts of negative obsessions can be very powerful, and it's easy for them to take hold, as they did for my friend's brother.

Now, every time he had a thought about the opposite sex, he was suddenly full of guilt, suddenly telling himself over and over "don't think about sex", and getting even more upset when those thoughts didn't go away--which did not make it easier for him to learn to interact with women. The obsession he had with not thinking about sex just gave those thoughts more power and heightened his emotional response.

My friend and I, on the other hand, even though we were going through the same problem, found that as time went on, things got easier. We learned how to communicate with people, the anxiety lessened as we learned that all the stuff we were confused about, all the stuff we didn't know about sex wasn't that big of a deal. We didn't give into those thoughts--we didn't have sex--but we learned to ignore them, to live with them, and we learned that they didn't have to define us or how we interacted with other people. Sure, it was a struggle sometimes, but we never let that struggle define who we are.

The bottom line is, whether you have a positive obsession with sex or a negative obsession with sex, you're still obsessed, and that isn't healthy. Trying to banish your own thoughts is never going to work, because the when you say "I have to get rid of my sexual thoughts", that is you thinking about your sexual thoughts.

It's a problem my friend's brother deals with to this day. He's a sweet guy, an intelligent guy, and he's not crazy, it's just that the anxiety of this has built up so much in his head for so long from books like this that he never had a chance to learn how to interact with people he's attracted to. He even enrolled in a group that helps people with sex addiction, despite the fact that he is still a virgin and in college, because these thoughts and this guilt still keeps him up at night, and prevent him from meeting or befriending women.

It's fine if people want to be abstinent, or if they want to live as Christians and marry as virgins, but this book is not the path to making peace with yourself and your feelings, it's a book that fosters repression and anxiety. Reading through it, I was struck with how the authors talk about sexual thoughts--it became immediately clear that people who repress their sexuality think about sex far more often than I ever have, even as an atheistic teenage boy, I never thought about sex as much as the examples in this book.

This book is not a representation of real life, or of normal human relationships. It is not a tool to help people come to terms with unwanted thoughts, nor will it help anyone to develop a healthy outlook on life and sexuality, Christian or otherwise. This book is full of nonsense and misinformation, and if you are a young man who already feels anxious about sex and women, this book will help to turn that anxiety into constant, life-long fear.

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Tremendous book! A must read for young men growing up in this generation. A must read for Pastors working with and counseling young men or who have been asked to be accountability partners!

Oct 12, 2007 Nicholas Bradley rated it it was amazing

Recommends it for: Any Guy

This book is just a toned down version of Every Man's Battle (my review is written below on that book). I did this book with a group of High School guys and it changed their outlook tremendously. It is filled with scripture and practical advice on how to help with lust, perversions, and poor sexual habits. It gets real and becomes intense at times but is a great book to do with others if you are looking for purity. I highly recommend it. Enjoy.

Review for Every Man's Battle:
I read this book ith a

Review for Every Man's Battle:
I read this book ith a group of guys a while back and it blew my mind how graphic and real it was. I almost blushed at the words written on the page. If you read this book with a group of men devoted to "cleaning up their act" and becoming more pure in their walk with Jesus, you will see some major barriers break down. This book helps with the Biblical principle of "iron sharpening iron" and jumps right into what has plagued men since the fall. I have heard of wives even reading this book and giving them a much better insight as to the war that rages on inside of the men of today. It will help sisters in Christ to understand how damaging it is to men when they wear certain clothing or act a certain way. This is a must read for any man who wants to get serious about getting real and getting pure. Enjoy.

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Read this book to help council a young man who was struggling with a porn addiction. Highly recommend this book for any young man to read. Book includes many great Biblical principles on sexual purity. Love the Biblical approach.

Dec 31, 2018 David McDonald rated it did not like it

This book is poison to the mind. I say that without engaging in any hyperbole.
I grew up implementing the things mentioned in the book, not only this book but "every man's battle" and the DVD that went along with it.
It approaches sexuality in a very archaic way at ends with modern psychology.
In the "Every Man's" series, they interview male prostitutes, members of broken families and serial killers (yes, they interviewed Ted Bundy) who are all too willing to blame porn and 'lust' for the way th This book is poison to the mind. I say that without engaging in any hyperbole.
I grew up implementing the things mentioned in the book, not only this book but "every man's battle" and the DVD that went along with it.
It approaches sexuality in a very archaic way at ends with modern psychology.
In the "Every Man's" series, they interview male prostitutes, members of broken families and serial killers (yes, they interviewed Ted Bundy) who are all too willing to blame porn and 'lust' for the way they 'ended up'.

I distinctly remember the story of one teenager who watched so much porn that he discovered that he had 'turned gay'.

On the night before his execution, Ted Bundy 'leaked' the earth-shattering relation between violent offenders in prison and their love of pornography. His correlation makes little sense when you consider that;

"A University of Sydney study of 20,000 Australians found 84 percent of men and 54 percent of women had watched porn, and more than half of men and women agreed that pornography could improve sexual relations among adults."

and that,

"The Relationships in America data reveal that 43 percent of men and 9 percent of women report watching pornography in the past week."

Everyone who even has the slightest understanding of human psychology knows that when you make something a "no" in your head, it creates a stronger desire to chase that thing.

My advice to anyone this series has hurt would be to put down this book and approach your internal shame with kindness as you destigmatise your sexual desires. If you believe you have unhealthy habits, take steps to introduce healthier habits. Too much junk food can make you fat, too much alcohol can increase the likeliness of habitual drinking.

Take a step back and focus your attention not on "stopping", not on "judging yourself", but on doing positive things that encourage healthier sexual behaviour. E.g. instead of staying up until your partner goes to sleep to watch porn, see if you can offer them a massage and build some intimacy. It's not what you want to do, sure... you would rather stay up watching porn, but you also would rather eat that entire bag of chocolates and then not go for that run, but if you do that, you'll get fat. I would recommend the book "Mating In Captivity" for an excellent approach to healthy desires.

Things are not as grim as described in this book. If your sexual behaviours are causing severe detrimental effects on your marriage, life or relationship, put down this book and seek professional help from an accredited behaviours therapist, not a pastor or a counsellor, but a psychologist who uses cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) or acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT)

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Jan 07, 2014 Cannon rated it did not like it

Got this book at a op shop while passing through Newcastle. Thought it would be funny but actually left me feeling very concerned for anyone who would read it. Wanted to some how give reach out and let them know that there sexuality is natural and ok. I see this as a book that is damaging in many ways. The mental health of anyone reading this and taking the recommendations on would be my greatest concern. As if life isn't hard enough without controlling your sexuality to the point of not masturb Got this book at a op shop while passing through Newcastle. Thought it would be funny but actually left me feeling very concerned for anyone who would read it. Wanted to some how give reach out and let them know that there sexuality is natural and ok. I see this as a book that is damaging in many ways. The mental health of anyone reading this and taking the recommendations on would be my greatest concern. As if life isn't hard enough without controlling your sexuality to the point of not masturbating and not authentically communicating with friends of potential sexual partners. It is also extremely mysogonist and archaic in its view and portrayal of women. It also normalises sexual experiences with women that are not consensual. One example being "I now I have pushed a women's boundaries putting putting my hand up her bra". It also paints women who have sex outside of marrige very badly and victims in some way. It also helps people to justify treating these people badly after as if it was not two consenting adults having sex. This is actually really fucked whoever wrote this book, sucks to be that guy!!!! My closing comment would be, when is the god /religion sector gonna learn that SEXUAL REPRESSION IS NEVER GOING TO WORK. All is does is turn people into creeps who I would never want to interact with. Sexuality is always going to find a way to manifest. You can approach it in a way that is healthy and a way that is not. Think all the sexual abuse the that church is dealing with. A product of dysfunctional approach to sex and sexuality. ...more

Jul 04, 2013 Dominic rated it it was ok

THE GOOD: This book is very practical, but I'm not entirely sure how to rate this book. For starters, the authors base their whole premise around the assumption that God will not help you, deliver you, or perform some sort of miracle to free you from the sins of sexual bondage.

THE BAD: Assuming that God will not help you, the authors conclude that it is up to us to do something about it; namely, by making a decision to:

1) quit stopping short of God's standards for us
2) and to stop lusting over

THE BAD: Assuming that God will not help you, the authors conclude that it is up to us to do something about it; namely, by making a decision to:

1) quit stopping short of God's standards for us
2) and to stop lusting over women (or men!) with our eyes.

"If you are in bondage to masturbation, should you try to break free?" Yes! In order to do so, the authors lay out 4 requirements:

1) Decision to no longer stop short
2) having an accountability partner
3) having active relationship with God
4) and being aware of what affects sex drive

The authors then lay out what should be every man's "Battle plan":

1) defense with your eyes
2) defense with your mind
3) defense with your heart

The authors argue that our focus should ultimately be on:

1) getting closer to God
2) and integrating our sexuality into our Christian lives

Which I believe are attributes every Christian should wish to attain. However, I didn't like the book because it sounded too much like a piece of secular "self-help" literature, akin to a "do-it-yourself" attitude that can only be attained if you try hard and practice constantly.

I believe in God's standards for us, but I also believe God wants to help us attain those standards. In my opinion, the best way to avoid going down a path of sexual sin is to cherish your relationship with God, remain in prayer, and seek out friends and accountable partners who are willing to hold us responsible.

THE UGLY: This book talks about masturbation for almost the entire duration, and although I understand that it is targeted more towards teenagers and young adults, it would have been nice to have more examples of sexual sin involving the opposite sex (although I expect the original book target to adults to be easier to relate to in that regard).

None the less, sexual sin is still sexual sin regardless of which kind it is, and if you are looking for a do-it-yourself approach, I suspect the principles in this book are fairly universal and would hold up against most kinds of sin that are sexual in nature.

I give it 2 stars, simply for putting the pressure entirely on us to succeed, and for almost completely ignoring the power and willingness of God in this domain to help us, lift us, and make us grow.

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Jun 03, 2013 Mark Zellner rated it did not like it

While the overall motive of the book is an admirable one, it is executed horribly. The authors go into highly unnecessary sordid detail about their struggle with pornography, which can put images into the reader's mind that are the exact opposite of the pure thoughts the book claims to uphold. As one friend of mine put it, "It's impossible for a male to read this book and not get aroused." If you want a good book on purity, check out Not Even a Hint by Josh Harris. Purity is something God desire While the overall motive of the book is an admirable one, it is executed horribly. The authors go into highly unnecessary sordid detail about their struggle with pornography, which can put images into the reader's mind that are the exact opposite of the pure thoughts the book claims to uphold. As one friend of mine put it, "It's impossible for a male to read this book and not get aroused." If you want a good book on purity, check out Not Even a Hint by Josh Harris. Purity is something God desires for all his children, but there's no need to drag your mind through the gutter to get there. ...more

Sep 06, 2011 Regina rated it did not like it

I actually only read about half of the book and then quit out of frustration. I really appreciated their book "Preparing Your Son for Every Man's Battle" and plan to use it in a few years with our son. However, this book not only had very similar material (including identical illustrations), but I did not agree with one of the primary points of the book (the M word). I don't see this as being a very practical book for teenage boys. I actually only read about half of the book and then quit out of frustration. I really appreciated their book "Preparing Your Son for Every Man's Battle" and plan to use it in a few years with our son. However, this book not only had very similar material (including identical illustrations), but I did not agree with one of the primary points of the book (the M word). I don't see this as being a very practical book for teenage boys. ...more

Jun 29, 2021 Ramón S. rated it really liked it

The language is very straightforward and sometimes can be even triggering but is a really sound book with very clear ideas and well explained. Highly recommended for those who want to win the battle against impurity and for all those who are not agree with the agenda of the mass media regarding sexuality.

A must read for every young man in our world's current state. A must read for every young man in our world's current state. ...more

The advice in this book is excellent and should be followed by all men, but I had to take away a couple of stars for two reasons:

1.) The book is (repeatedly) unnecessarily graphic in it's depictions of sexual acts and thoughts. This could very easily cause a young person to stumble.

The advice in this book is excellent and should be followed by all men, but I had to take away a couple of stars for two reasons:

1.) The book is (repeatedly) unnecessarily graphic in it's depictions of sexual acts and thoughts. This could very easily cause a young person to stumble.

2.) In several places, the book states that lustful thoughts are adultery. Not "like" adultery, but according to the authors, lustful thoughts constitute actual adultery. The authors don't attempt to follow this idea to it's illogical conclusion, but if their idea was correct, then if a husband ever had a lustful thought during the course of his marriage, it would be scriptural grounds for the wife to divorce him! They base this idea on a misinterpretation of Matthew 5:27-28, where Jesus points out that sin starts in the mind, and that to God seriously contemplating a sin is as bad as committing the sin. This doesn't make the thought and the action the same sin however, just equally wrong. So this passage shouldn't be used in such a way that would create a "loophole" for someone wanting to abandon their spouse.

If you can overlook the two above glaring problems, than the advice in the book is all practical. Just be sure that you read it before you hand it out blindly to young people.

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Apr 29, 2021 Isaac rated it it was amazing

This is one of those WOW!! I'm so glad I picked this book this year! My life is forever changed!! God answered all of my questions through this book! It cause you to read something and the close the book, lay it on your lap and meditate on what you have just read. The author shares his own life/story and he challenges and dares us to change our lives! I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend this book 🙌🏿! This is one of those WOW!! I'm so glad I picked this book this year! My life is forever changed!! God answered all of my questions through this book! It cause you to read something and the close the book, lay it on your lap and meditate on what you have just read. The author shares his own life/story and he challenges and dares us to change our lives! I HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend this book 🙌🏿! ...more

Oct 20, 2017 Owen rated it it was amazing

Before I read this book I thought it was just fine to have sexual temptation for a teenager like me. I am a teenage Christian who attends a local youth group. its very challenging to stay pure in America today with all the half naked women on billboards. I listened to the book and started to change my eyes to start looking away from stuff like that. I am here to say that you wont win your first few battles and its hard not to just give up. After 6 weeks I was able to become clean. This is like Before I read this book I thought it was just fine to have sexual temptation for a teenager like me. I am a teenage Christian who attends a local youth group. its very challenging to stay pure in America today with all the half naked women on billboards. I listened to the book and started to change my eyes to start looking away from stuff like that. I am here to say that you wont win your first few battles and its hard not to just give up. After 6 weeks I was able to become clean. This is like fighting a war you have to have a strategy. if you know there is a billboard coming up with inappropriate things on it look away. Don't be alone with your phone in your hand. Its also like a war cause, yes you will lose individual battles but then when you begin to win them in your mind you'll win the battle. when you become pure you feel a lot closer to god and you can have whole new relationships with women because you don't see them as objects anymore you start seeing them as human beings who have the same needs and wants the things that you want. this book has changed my relationship with the girls in my life and has also brought me so much closer to God. ...more

Jul 31, 2014 Chris French rated it it was amazing

It doesn't hurt to look, right guys…and ladies? It's not cheating as long as I don't touch. Over the last couple of decades this has become as much of a problem for women as it has historically been for men, thus we have movies like Magic Mike and People's issue of Sexiest Man Alive. Lust isn't a new problem for either gender though. You can trace it's root in women back to Potiphar's wife, although undoubtedly she's not the first person to encounter lust.

So what do you think? Does it hurt to lo

So what do you think? Does it hurt to look as long as I don't touch? Jesus certainly thought so!

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery.' But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.

- Matthew 5.27-30

Adultery is the action, but lust is the driving force behind it. Jesus condemns both unequivocally. It DOES hurt just to look! In Every Young Man's battle Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker compare lust to a sumo wrestler. He wants to get bigger so he eats more. The more you allow yourself to lust the stronger your drive for it becomes and the harder the habit is to break. You've fed Sermon on the Mountyour lust sumo wrestler so much that it's next to impossible to beat him. You've got to starve him back down to a manageable size. Cut out all the glances you allow yourself, quit the porn, stop looking at fitness magazines and stop watching provocative shows. Go cold turkey. This is the only way to beat your lust problem. You've got to starve it down to a size where you can control it. If you've never read Every Young Man's Battle it's worth a read. They have several helpful techniques that will help you starve the lust sumo.

At the very heart of our lust problem though is a lack of intimacy. We're searching for intimacy and we can't find it so we pervert true intimacy into lust. You need to starve the lust sumo, but if you never deal with the driving force behind your lust, a lack of intimacy, you're going to wind up feeding your lust again and again. If you're married work on your intimacy with your spouse. Make sure you're sharing everything with them. Be completely transparent. You're also going to need a group of people around you who share your sexual standards that can hold you accountable and encourage you. I feel like this could go unsaid, but just in case…make sure the members of this group are all the same gender as you. Don't play around with lust or you'll get burned. The final connection we're missing that will help us control our lust is intimacy with God. A weekend relationship with your spouse wouldn't be good enough so only interacting with God on the weekends isn't going to work either. For more on the intimacy side of controlling lust you can read Tactics by Fred Stoeker. I reviewed it here if you're interested.

Here's the weird thing about lust: it doesn't need to be stamped out, it needs to be controlled. It need direction. Lust is a God-given desire. We've abused it and let our lust run wild throughout our lives doing whatever it wants. Lust has a place. That place is within your marriage. There it's a good thing. Anywhere else it's just as harmful as adultery.

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Great book to help young men cope with the many struggles to maintain sexual purity (of mind and body) in our modern world. My fear would be that it would be a condemning book that would cause a sensitive young man to be given lists and lists of dos and don'ts that would be essentially unattainable or to feel like a failure because of his past mistakes. I thought it might end up legalistic and pharisaical, inventing "rules" where God has not spoken. Instead, it was refreshingly honest and insigh Great book to help young men cope with the many struggles to maintain sexual purity (of mind and body) in our modern world. My fear would be that it would be a condemning book that would cause a sensitive young man to be given lists and lists of dos and don'ts that would be essentially unattainable or to feel like a failure because of his past mistakes. I thought it might end up legalistic and pharisaical, inventing "rules" where God has not spoken. Instead, it was refreshingly honest and insightful. Grace abounded and it is written from the heart of those "who learned the hard way," and would like to pass on the wisdom they learned to help young men avoid some, if not all, of the pitfalls associated with their very natural sexual drive. It was Scriptural and provided strategies rather than rules. But, it deals very straightforwardly with topics like porn, masturbation, wet dreams, etc. So, depending on your sensitivities, it could be a little much for you. I would recommend that it be read and discussed with a trusted adult male and not just handed to your 12-year-old to try and digest and figure out on his own. A young man of 16+ years may benefit from reading it individually, but would benefit more with someone to discuss it with. As a mother of teen girls, it helped me to understand the very real pressures their male friends are struggling with. I have been able to help them understand how to be more sensitive and discerning, to look for young men who at least want to be pure, and to be alert to the dangers they face from those men who do not care about sexual purity at all. ...more

Feb 27, 2017 Zach Koenig rated it really liked it

Reading a book like "Every Young Man's Battle" is an eye-opening experience, with its frank discussions of such topics as sexual attraction, masturbation, and pre-marital sex. However, it is also an extraordinary challenge, as the author of this book proclaims religious teachings that are quite strict when compared to the "real world".

In this book, Stoeker exhorts a philosophy of absolutely no sexual experiences before marriage whatsoever. This includes sex (obviously), masturbation, or even thi

In this book, Stoeker exhorts a philosophy of absolutely no sexual experiences before marriage whatsoever. This includes sex (obviously), masturbation, or even things that seem simple like kissing or even being alone with a person in the wrong circumstances.

On the one hand, his teachings make sense. The whole goal of his message is to bring people closer to God by abstaining from sexual practices before marriage. Without that "distraction", so to speak, it stands to reason that one can become closer to God.

On the other hand, some of his more hard-line guidelines seem nearly impossible to follow. I know it makes sense what he is saying, but reading this book gave me the feeling that I will never succeed at the battle for sexual purity.

Overall, this is a challenging book that will throw many hot-button issues at you regarding sexuality as a man. I understand the message, but it seems like such a large hill to climb. That is why the material is so challenging. It takes everything the world tells you and turns it on its ear. That's a good thing, spiritually, but almost frightening to consider implementing in your own live.

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This book - which has been praised by so many young and old men alike - was gifted to me when I was just that: a young man. I did, however, not end up reading it for many years later, at least until I was 18. Even still, this book would impact my life way more than I knew it at the time, and would continue to lay down a foundation for biblical manhood and biblical purity long before I reached such a platform in my Christian walk.

As a young man who was addicted to pornography, lust, sex, and all

As a young man who was addicted to pornography, lust, sex, and all sorts of other devious immoral acts, when I became a Christian, this is one of the books that I went back to, desperately looking for freedom. This book, along with Craig Gross' literature and the ministry of XXX Church helped me to find that freedom in Christ! I have now been a born-again Christian for two and a half years, and have been also been free from pornography for two and a half years! Only by the grace of God do I continue to grow in personal purity, so much so that I am bringing every thought under subjection unto Christ!

If any young man be struggling with purity, or whether he is walking the straight and narrow already, this is a book that men should read.

Brent M. McCulley (10/17/13)

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Jan 11, 2016 Patrick Chester rated it really liked it

Recommends it for: young and/or single men

Having first read Every Man's Battle, I came into this book already knowing about 60% of the lessons that would be taught. The lessons hold true for both books, with every young man's battle having a younger and more relaxed tone, taking ample opportunities to interject some of the vernacular of teenagers. As a young man in my 20s, I sometimes found this distracting, but the author still presented the truths in an uncompromising way. What sets Every Young Man's Battle apart from Every Man's Batt Having first read Every Man's Battle, I came into this book already knowing about 60% of the lessons that would be taught. The lessons hold true for both books, with every young man's battle having a younger and more relaxed tone, taking ample opportunities to interject some of the vernacular of teenagers. As a young man in my 20s, I sometimes found this distracting, but the author still presented the truths in an uncompromising way. What sets Every Young Man's Battle apart from Every Man's Battle is it's focus on strong issues of single young men: validation, the sex drive, and masturbation. This filled in some of the gaps left by Every Man's Battle (as the book focused on married men). Overall I recommend this book to any young or single man looking to find freedom from the lures of sexual temptation. ...more

Jun 22, 2017 Liam rated it it was amazing

I found this when looking for a different book, read the beginning, and ended up reading it straight through over the next 3-4 hours. This book works through a conversation that desperately needs to be had for many people, and it does it in a clear and readable way. It puts forth reasonable conclusions about Christianity and sexuality, and backs them up with Biblical references, while keeping in mind the real pressures of emotional and chemical imbalance in the body and mind. It is rather evocat I found this when looking for a different book, read the beginning, and ended up reading it straight through over the next 3-4 hours. This book works through a conversation that desperately needs to be had for many people, and it does it in a clear and readable way. It puts forth reasonable conclusions about Christianity and sexuality, and backs them up with Biblical references, while keeping in mind the real pressures of emotional and chemical imbalance in the body and mind. It is rather evocative in its descriptions at times, so it might be better suited to someone who is struggling with this question already rather than to someone who is new to the battlefield— but all the same, it's an excellent discussion of Christianity, sexuality, and authentic manhood. No one wants to talk about this stuff, but that's why it needs to be discussed. ...more

Oct 25, 2010 Doug Dale rated it it was amazing

I was impressed by this book even more than "Every Man's Battle" for some reason. The authors hit the subject head on and while parents will wince when thinking about having their teen boys read it, the fact of the matter is that our sons have been (or soon will be) exposed to every word/concept/activity that is discussed (fathers, think honestly about when you were first exposed to these things).

I appreciated the balance between setting clear standards and also communicating grace recognizing t

I appreciated the balance between setting clear standards and also communicating grace recognizing that most young men will fail in this area even when strong convictions have been built up.

As difficult as this subject it, I'm looking forward to passing this on to my sons as they reach the appropriate age.

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There was some good information in this book regarding how men think about sex and how to break pornography addictions. Additionally, the book was nicely organized, and provided for easy reading. Many approaches taken in the book were very encouraging, backed with many testimonies. Something that I specifically liked was that it did not involve shaming, but focused solely on changing and picking yourself back up when you have fallen. The biggest problem that I found, that has been repeatedly sta There was some good information in this book regarding how men think about sex and how to break pornography addictions. Additionally, the book was nicely organized, and provided for easy reading. Many approaches taken in the book were very encouraging, backed with many testimonies. Something that I specifically liked was that it did not involve shaming, but focused solely on changing and picking yourself back up when you have fallen. The biggest problem that I found, that has been repeatedly stated in other reviews is the unnecessarily provocative language. I believe the author done this in attempt to not sound repetitive when talking about sexual temptation, but the language used could cause people to stumble in their addictions. ...more

Mar 07, 2021 Joshua Reid rated it it was amazing

Every Young Man's battle is such an amazing book. Broken up into 6 parts, the book charts testimonies and experiences of other young men who have wrestled with sexual immorality, either from pornography or from their harmful addiction to masturbating.

One of the key takeaways for me is that, in large part due to the world we live in, we've become almost desensitized to this sort of practice and see it as normal instead of how God sees it. Immoral and outside the confines of marriage. For singles,

This book is one that I highly recommend for all young men, whether Christian or not, to read.

Overall, I'd give this a 5 out of 5 stars.

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Jun 18, 2014 D rated it really liked it

I found this book in a thrift store and, as a Christian wife, mother and grandmother of men and boys, decided to read it. It is an excellent book - giving a Christian perspective on sexual purity. The book candidly discusses the male battle with sexual temptation and gives strategies with which to combat temptation. I wish I had read this book or one like it many years ago. Parts of the book are very candid and the perspective is decidedly Christian, which some will not agree with, but it does g I found this book in a thrift store and, as a Christian wife, mother and grandmother of men and boys, decided to read it. It is an excellent book - giving a Christian perspective on sexual purity. The book candidly discusses the male battle with sexual temptation and gives strategies with which to combat temptation. I wish I had read this book or one like it many years ago. Parts of the book are very candid and the perspective is decidedly Christian, which some will not agree with, but it does give a lot of weight to the argument for abstinence before marriage and sexual purity throughout life. I would recommend it not only for men, but for Christian wives, mothers and girl friends. ...more

Jul 11, 2015 James Tuttle rated it did not like it

I can show the problem with this book in one Bible verse. Romans 5:20, "The Law came in that transgression might increase." When Christians do nothing but tell people what to do and what not to do, people only sin more.
That's what this book did to me. I became so aware of my lust, that it became worse. In study hall, I condemned people for lusting even though I was lusting. It happened because this book produced an awareness of sin in me.
If you are struggling with lust, you really need to focus I can show the problem with this book in one Bible verse. Romans 5:20, "The Law came in that transgression might increase." When Christians do nothing but tell people what to do and what not to do, people only sin more.
That's what this book did to me. I became so aware of my lust, that it became worse. In study hall, I condemned people for lusting even though I was lusting. It happened because this book produced an awareness of sin in me.
If you are struggling with lust, you really need to focus on the love and grace of God. Follow a good teacher like Joseph Prince. Also study Romans. It's better than reading this godless book. ...more

Apr 16, 2008 Derrick rated it really liked it

A good book that helps explain exactly what it says, how to avoid sexual temptation in the world and culture we live in. The advice it gives is very practical and simple enough to incorporate into daily life. The things I learned then I still notice myself practicing now. I would recommend this book to anyone who is feeling that sexual temptation is too great and wanting to have some practical tools to help them avoid the temptation.

This book was really good. It helped me realize certain things about God and myself. I thankful that I bought this book. The things they suggest I do have been really helpful. The only complaint I have about it is some of the images they talk about are quite descriptive and graphic. IF you really are struggling with the stuff talked about in this book these examples may be distracting. But that is my only issue with it.

Sep 08, 2015 Kiwi rated it it was amazing

This is a well written book. All young men should read it and I would even recommend young women reading it. It is good for both young men and women because I don't think girls understand what an impact we have on young men and how much of a difference we can make for good. If we work to help each other in our sexual battles it will be a lot easier. So I hope you tell the young people in your life to read this book and the others in the series. This is a well written book. All young men should read it and I would even recommend young women reading it. It is good for both young men and women because I don't think girls understand what an impact we have on young men and how much of a difference we can make for good. If we work to help each other in our sexual battles it will be a lot easier. So I hope you tell the young people in your life to read this book and the others in the series. ...more

Jul 24, 2016 Joms rated it did not like it

It's all about imposing that sexual innuendos are morally bad and we should stop being promiscuous prior the sanctified marriage. Pretty ascetic, though I do not mind.

Then it targets the case of masturbation. Uh-oh. God gave us hands to rub it on our respective gear shifts (in certain circumstances, on others), prior marriage, to enjoy his gift of orgasm. One shouldn't taint the sanctity of such a holy practice we, mostly the unmarried, have within our arsenals.

It's all about imposing that sexual innuendos are morally bad and we should stop being promiscuous prior the sanctified marriage. Pretty ascetic, though I do not mind.

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Stephen Arterburn is the founder and chairman of New Life Ministries—the nation's largest faith-based broadcast, counseling, and treatment ministry—and is the host of the nationally syndicated New Life Live! daily radio program aired on over 180 radio stations nationwide, Sirius XM radio, and on television. Steve is also the founder of the Women of Faith conferences, attended by over 4 million wom Stephen Arterburn is the founder and chairman of New Life Ministries—the nation's largest faith-based broadcast, counseling, and treatment ministry—and is the host of the nationally syndicated New Life Live! daily radio program aired on over 180 radio stations nationwide, Sirius XM radio, and on television. Steve is also the founder of the Women of Faith conferences, attended by over 4 million women, and of HisMatchforMe.com.
Steve is a nationally known public speaker and has been featured in national media venues such as Oprah, Inside Edition, Good Morning America, CNN Live, the New York Times, USA Today, and US News & World Report.
In August 2000, Steve was inducted into the National Speakers Association's Hall of Fame. A bestselling author, Steve has written more than one hundred books, including the popular Every Man's series and his most recent book, Healing Is a Choice. He is a Gold Medallion–winning author and has been nominated for numerous other writing awards.
Steve has degrees from Baylor University and the University of North Texas as well as two honorary doctorate degrees. Steve is a teaching pastor at Northview Church in suburban Indianapolis and resides with his family in Indiana.
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